Alicia1578's Weblog

Dr visit and stuff

alicia1578 — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 19:40:42 +0000

So today Zachary had a Dr visit for the first time in over a year. He had to get 4 shots. It was rough but he did well and didn’t thrash or scream like a banshee. I was very surprised. After the Dr visit we went to lunch with my mother, brother Josh and sister Bryana. We had horrible service and I had to rush out of there because my neighbor had called looking for me. Her daughters had told her that I wanted her to watch Gabby and that I was only gonna be gone for an hour. Of course this being the wrong information my neighbor was very upset and now Gabby’s playmates are grounded for lying. I felt really bad and called to apologize again. She stated the problem was not me but the issue was her girls lying to her. I was glad to know we were OK regardless. So now I’m home. Zachary is resting and Gabby is trying to find entertainment. I’m so stuffed from lunch I can’t even think about dinner plans tonight. Sean will be home soon and I know he is gonna be begging for dinner tonight.

Well I’m gonna go chill out for alittle. Bye for now.

Time Flys

alicia1578 — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 18:35:50 +0000

I haven’t been on this thing in almost a month. Its been a bit busy I guess. Not to mention we were having some computer problems pretty much the whole month of June. We had to buckle down and buy a new one. Its a lovely thing but not good timing on the pocket book.

Zachary’s 3rd b-day is tomorrow! We are having his party on the 19th of July. Should be fun. I’m having my usual beef, chips, and some snacks of course. Its lookin to be a pretty small event. I’m not doing the jumpy thingy either. Its just too much money and there’s not gonna be that many kids here I don’t think. I think tomorrow for his actual b-day we might go to chuckie cheese or hook up with Granny Patti. Not real sure of our choice yet. I haven’t even bought him presents yet. I feel like he has too much already anyway. I was gonna head out today and pick some things up but Sean wants to be a part of it as well. So I think we might have my brother josh hang on to the kids for awhile tomorrow so we can get this done. Josh doesn’t even know yet…lol This month has come so fast. We are alittle disorganized.

Gabby is enjoying her summer. Wants to be entertained every minute but seems to be enjoying herself. Her friends Jennifer and Allison have been around alot. They will be leaving for two weeks as of the 19th. I don’t know what Gabby is gonna do with herself. She loves swimming in our pool and its hard to get her out for lunch and dinner sometimes. She loves to swim like I did at her age. She is also is in a theatre group called “HALO” They are teaching her vocals, dance, and of course theatre. She goes twice a week for Halo. She loves every minute of it. Her performance will be Aug 14-16. So a heads up to everyone for that. I also signed her back up for Soccer which will be starting again in the fall. Its been nice to be able to put her in activities like this. She enjoys all of them.

Sean and I aren’t so exciting. We had a nice 4th of July over at our neighbors. I had Lynn and my brother with me as well. Josh and I drank too much beer and I had a mild hangover on Saturday. Sunday we spent the day in the pool splashing around while Sean was at work. My brother Josh, sister Bryana and Lynn were around as well. Lynn bought us all food and we BBQ. It was a really nice day. The weekend went lovely.

I need to eat some lunch. Bye for now.

Pottie training and random stuff

alicia1578 — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:23:40 +0000

Once again its been awhile. My computer had been down for two days. I think we need a new power supply. I got the puter back up and running though for now I guess. Its running warm too. Not sure why. I need to get that looked at. I think one of my fans is broken. Anyway…

So I really need to get my soon to be 3 year old potty trained. It seems like a pretty easy tasks but I find that whenever I mention peeing on the potty he really could care less about it. We have bought him cool underware and the whole nine but he still refuses to join the band wagon. Stubborn little thing. I guess this is gonna be a fight. I seriously dread it. Everything with Zachary is way more work then it should be but thats Zachary (aka BUTTHEAD) I personally don’t think he is ready. Of course everyone thinks I’m just being lazy and unproductive with him. I don’t think potty training should be a “crying fest” or something you “make” them do. I think its more natural. So of course with that outlook I get labeled as “too lazy and un-determind” Damn if I do damn if don’t. So to make a long story short I think this is going to be a rough journey ahead. Any pointer, suggestions, comments, or whatever would be appreciated.

On a more serious note. Gabby almost got hit by a car last nite. It was her fault. She was riding in the street and did not look when she was coming around the corner to on coming traffic. Thank god the women driving was not speeding as most of the cars do on our street. I still play the situation out in my head and wonder how she was not hit. I can only thank God and my angels. Needless to say I was a wreck, she was a wreck as well. I cried so hard I threw up. Gabby was very upset herself and we called it an early nite lastnite. We were all in the house by 6:30. We had ate an early dinner because everyone was starving previously before the incident. It was such a surreal moment for me. As I laid in bed last nite. i thought about how fragile life is and how I cannot be there to save her from every harmful situation. I know this probley won’t be the last scare in my life with my children but I pray that they are few and far between and that the outcome is more postive then not. Enough of this sad stuff…

I had mentioned that i planted several veggies this year. They all seem to be doing super. I’m proud. With the rain. I haven’t had to worry about water as much but I have kept a close eye regardless. Its been fun to see them grow. I can’t wait to enjoy and share the fruits of our(lynn and mine) labor. If all the tomatoes plants make it I’m gonna have a ton of tomatoes. Anyway, thats the update on my garden. Not really much to report.

I should get going for the day.

Bye for now…

This weather!

alicia1578 — Tue, 27 May 2008 17:39:38 +0000

Ok seriously how does it go from being 80+ degrees to 50! This has been the worst spring for weather. Cold cold cold. I want it to be warm already. However the nice thing about this is that my ac is down right now and its been good not having to sweat it out too much lately. Yesterday was rough.

Its one of those lay around the house and sleep days. Too bad that Zachary doesn’t agree with that idea. As soon as he lays down for his nap. I’am so napping!!! We had a good day yesterday. Sean took Gabby and her friends to the pool most of the day. Zachary and I hung out at home and played in the front yard with the neighbor kids. Later we grilled burgers, ate chips, and I drank blue moon. Just before bedtime we set off a few fireworks we bought from Tennessee. Lynn and Josh came over and we had a pretty chill day.

Today is Sean sisters b-day. She is offically 18. I feel so old=( We got her some cards and that was about it. We gave money twards her laptop for graduation so I didn’t feel it was that necessary to get her a b-day gift. However i might pick up something little later.

Well I’m gonna get some lunch going here so that i can put the monster down.

Bye for now

Graduation time and more

alicia1578 — Sat, 24 May 2008 15:05:24 +0000

Hello world. I have been a busy bee these days. Since my last post coming back from NC. I can’t seem to sit still. Yesterday was Alethea’s graduation ceremony from High School. I’m starting to feel really old. I remember when this kid was like 5 or 6. Time sure does fly. I Couldn’t help but be so proud of her. She has amazing artistic talent. I never really knew that side of her until these last few years. Pretty impressive too. I wish I could show you all some of her work. June 14 is the party to celebrate her birthday, her siblings b-days, and her graduation. Should be fun!

I got my haircut yesterday FINALLY. It was so over due. I had about 4-6 inches cut off. Crazy huh? It feels so much better though. I don’t know why I waited so long. Like I said in the previous paragraph I have been a busy bee these days. I have been trying to plant in my garden too. I think today I will finish the veggies I have bought before they die. I’m trying tomatoes again this year. Also cucumbers, green peppers, and green onions. Should be interesting. I Also have some herbs such as cilantro, and basil. I was trying to grow a “salsa garden” so that I was able to make salsa all summer. Will see how it all goes. I think maybe I’m being a bit ambiguous. This weather has been so cold I have been afraid to put them in the ground. However I was thinking about this yesterday and realized that I bought all these goodies outdoors surely they can be outdoors in my neck of the woods…lol What a genius I’am!

Anyway I need to get moving for my day. I need to run to Menard’s and find some things. Hope everyone has a great Memorial Day.

Bye for now

It’s been awhile again

alicia1578 — Sat, 17 May 2008 23:52:59 +0000

I can’t seem to get enough time to keep up with this blogging stuff. I guess I will update everyone.

First off my mothers day weekend was spent in North Carolina. My great grandma(one of two of my blood) is on her last ride of her life right now. She had fluid on her lungs and was almost lost twice(before we visited) They have gotten the fluid out of her lungs but her heart is only functioning at about 25%, which isn’t good of course. So to make a long story short she has recovered some and his doing well but because her heart is so weak there’s not much else they can do for her. She is currently staying at a nursing home. Which of course she is not happy with. My aunt works evenings and isn’t home enough to take care of her. Her hands are tied. So I’m pretty sure my great grandma doesn’t have much time life. She is 93 and has been fighting for her life for awhile now. I sure hope i live to see that age! Its sad for me because this is all I have as far as my kin goes. I have had a lot of loss in my life and sometimes I wonder why me? I have always desired deep family connections. Unfortunately for me that’s never happened and I’m not so sure it ever will. I can only create that kind of life for my kids and hope that they feel the love of “a family” and pass those things along in there lives as they expand. My wish and prayers these days are for deeper family connections and love.

On another note my mom was suppose to graduate this weekend. She did not graduate and now has to repeat her last semester of school and now hopefully graduating in Dec/Jan. Family is in town to celebrate so needless to say there’s no celebration so everyone is just kinda “hanging” I believe they are all going home tomorrow. Its been nice to enjoy family this weekend but I can’t help but feel a “fake” sense of admiration and connection. Those that know my family situation know what i mean. Its been frustrating for me and aggravating. I try to stay positive and hope for the best but I can’t help but wonder what is gonna lie ahead for my family. Only time will tell I guess. My prayer is that we will have peace and that everyone will feel loved and cared for regardless of what happens.

With all that said. Today is a nice day and its Saturday. Gabby has a game. Go purple gators! She is really excited because her uncle, and aunts will be coming. Speaking of game I should probley get moving. I need to shower and get myself ready amongst getting my kids ready as well. Life is good!

Bye for now

Holy Hot Night

alicia1578 — Wed, 07 May 2008 14:06:35 +0000

So it was the most uncomfortable nites sleep i have had since I was pregnant. I felt like my body was swelling up the whole nite. Then all of a sudden at 3am I got reflux. I’m sure its a symptom of my weight. As if that wasn’t enough Zachary was in and out of our bed all nite as well. So I got practically no sleep. I feel like a zombie right now. Its so stuffy in this house. Our ac is down and we are not sure whats wrong. Our friend Al is suppose to come fix it when he has time. I had called him a week ago but he had sprained his leg and was out of work. So that means we have to wait or pay some other company way too much. Its not life threatening so we will tough it out.

Another rainy, gloomy day. I’m ready for it to stay nice for awhile. Its long over due. Gabby has another game Saturday and I’m gonna be bummed if its cold and rainy again. We haven’t had very many nice games. I think maybe one. Very frustrating. Hopefully also she won’t get crushed again. They just can’t seem to win. Poor purple gators. They sure do have fun though. I guess that’s the point.

So this weekend is mothers day. Sean works all day. I got the ipod touch as my mothers day gift. I don’t need or want anything anyway. Hopefully I will get cards from my kids. On another note, my brother Josh whom I’m very close to will be home. I have missed him so much. The kids love him so much as well. I can hardly wait.

Well I should get going on my day. I need to run to target. I know HUGE surprise there huh…lol

Long time…forgot to post this last nite

alicia1578 — Wed, 07 May 2008 13:47:55 +0000

Its been awhile. I have been kept outside against my will for hours at a time by a little two year old. I mean I can’t even get him inside so that i can go potty. I have been enjoying the outdoors myself but at times I just want to come inside and get out of the sun…lol I need to get some kind of locks on my doors so that he can’t escape whenever he pleases. Its been a nice couple of days. I don’t think its gonna be so nice the rest of the week though. Welcome to Chicago huh?

So I have been inspired to do some gardening this year. Nothing too crazy cause I really don’t have room. I just want a few things here and there. I tried growing green zebra tomatoes in a pot last year but the whole plant got tomato rot and was ruined after all my efforts…I was bummed and pissed. So this time I think I will try and do it in the ground. Hopefully I will get organized soon and get on it so that I’m not too far behind on my growing. I look forward to growing veggies and things again this year. Cross your fingers for me so that everything makes it. I have also been trying to tackle filling in the empty spots in my landscape. Last year we paid a company way too much money to landscape the yard but no plants were added, just beds were made. The plan was for me to add them this spring as I could afford and go from there. I find it to be frustrating because I’m not sure of were, what, and how things should be planted. I feel overwhelmed and not sure were to start. Needless to say I have thought of hiring landscapers again. I have had a couple quotes, one being pretty pricey in my opinion for what little I want planted and the other being a bit desperate and strange to hire. My second quote was from a man that Sean sold things to from his job. He showed up at my house today originally telling me 1,400.00 i just about swallowed my tongue. He could tell I wasn’t very happy and then started decreasing the price as I hummed and hawed. Finally the lovely hubby came to the resue and he went from 1,400.00 to 750.00 HUGE price jump. We agreed on that figure but I was still unsettled. I felt alittle concerned with the ability of this company and there knowledge, not say mine is of an expertise but I questioned some of his ideas of what was dead in my garden already and what wasn’t. I called my hubby later in the evening to say I didn’t feel comfortable and wanted to cancel the appt in the morning. He was ok with the idea and relayed the message to the company. However later that evening my hubby calls me again to say that the landscaper has come down to 450.00 All this making me even more leery of this company. I mean seriously how do you go from 1,400.00-450.00 All big red flags to me. I don’t know call me skeptical but I just can’t see it all panning out the way I want it. So to make a long story short. We have to buy the flowers and tell the landscaper were we want them planted. Now the whole reason why I wanted to hire someone from the start was so that they would know were and what to plant in the areas I would like more plants. So if I hire this landscaper I’m buying plants and telling him were to put them and he is also laying down mulch for me as well. Which is not what my original thoughts were. Crazy huh, sends my head in to spins thinking about it really. I have no clue whats going on now and what were are gonna do. I’m thinking maybe I will just do it myself at this point no matter how slow or horrible I do it. Everyone has gotta learn something right? I feel exhausted thinking about doing it…lol

Anyway, I should go for now. I need to get some water and relax. Hopefully my next post will come sooner this time. Bye for now!

May 1 forgot to publish

alicia1578 — Wed, 07 May 2008 13:46:38 +0000

Mornings are always so slow in my house. Everyone of us move like a snail. Unfortunately that causes us to miss Gabby’s bus alot…not that big of a deal. I just drive her and off she goes. As I came home from dropping Gabby off at school. My lovely hubby was up making breakfast already. I was literally gone 5 min. I think he is feeling guilty for leaving us all weekend. He is going to visit family in Michigan. Which is fine with me. I’m just worried about him getting a speeding ticket. Hopefully he won’t though.

On another note. We are raising butterflies and one of them hatched today. It was a cool thing for Gabby to see before she went off to school. There’s 4 more to go now. I’m sure its gonna happen quickly from here out. I wish I could keep them forever. Its fun to do and Gabby really enjoys the cycle of life.

I have been thinking of doing another garden this year. however last year I tried growing tomatoes and it failed. I grew them in a pot so maybe I need to consider the ground this time. I want to grow cucumbers, green onions, and tomatoes. I don’t want anything HUGE but something more manageable.

I did it and life

alicia1578 — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 16:21:09 +0000

I bit the bullet and bought the ipod touch. Its really amazing. I’m very intrigued by this gadget. I struggled with feeling guilty about spending that kind of money on myself but like i said in my previous post, I’m hoping it will inspire me to exercise alittle more. At least walk or something. It plays movies and stuff as well. Totally crazy!! I still have lots of learning to do on it considering it has several functions besides movies and songs. I get frustrated easily when I can’t figure things out, such as this website. I put it down for awhile and try again later. This website confuses me as well. I love the Internet but sometimes its complicated.

So last nite my son was a totally nut case. Bouncing off the walls, crabby, and unreasonable. It amazes me how much he acts like Sean. Gabby was alittle un-focused as well. I have to remind myself that my kids are children and not robots as my lovely friend Lynn so kindly reminded me. I need to have more patience but I don’t. How do you get more patients? Besides drugs…lol I have considered going on meds myself just so that I’m not as edgy. I seem to be anxious alot. I have a lot on my mind these days. I worry more then people know. I seem very strong most of the time but alot of the time my walls are up and my defensive side is on. This year has started off on a positive note for the most part. Sean and I have gained control of our finances again and seem to be doing ok. Of course there’s still more we can pay off, which seems like it never ends but were are working at it slowly and also rewarding ourselves at the same time. Hence my spending the money on the ipod touch=) Sean’s job is well and he seems to be really happy there. I have alot to be grateful for. I just wonder why my patience is thin and why I seem edgy alot. Its annoying. I can’t imagine bringing more kids into the world at this time in my life. I can barely deal with the children I have. I crave for connected and deep relationships with my children, friends and family. Some of those relationships I don’t know if it will ever happen. I pray for peace of mind, forgiveness, and patience. I’m hoping in journaling my feelings down that it will make me more aware of my choices and thoughts through out my day.

I must go. My little one needs to go outside and play. I will be back later…