I can’t seem to get enough time to keep up with this blogging stuff. I guess I will update everyone.
First off my mothers day weekend was spent in North Carolina. My great grandma(one of two of my blood) is on her last ride of her life right now. She had fluid on her lungs and was almost lost twice(before we visited) They have gotten the fluid out of her lungs but her heart is only functioning at about 25%, which isn’t good of course. So to make a long story short she has recovered some and his doing well but because her heart is so weak there’s not much else they can do for her. She is currently staying at a nursing home. Which of course she is not happy with. My aunt works evenings and isn’t home enough to take care of her. Her hands are tied. So I’m pretty sure my great grandma doesn’t have much time life. She is 93 and has been fighting for her life for awhile now. I sure hope i live to see that age! Its sad for me because this is all I have as far as my kin goes. I have had a lot of loss in my life and sometimes I wonder why me? I have always desired deep family connections. Unfortunately for me that’s never happened and I’m not so sure it ever will. I can only create that kind of life for my kids and hope that they feel the love of “a family” and pass those things along in there lives as they expand. My wish and prayers these days are for deeper family connections and love.
On another note my mom was suppose to graduate this weekend. She did not graduate and now has to repeat her last semester of school and now hopefully graduating in Dec/Jan. Family is in town to celebrate so needless to say there’s no celebration so everyone is just kinda “hanging” I believe they are all going home tomorrow. Its been nice to enjoy family this weekend but I can’t help but feel a “fake” sense of admiration and connection. Those that know my family situation know what i mean. Its been frustrating for me and aggravating. I try to stay positive and hope for the best but I can’t help but wonder what is gonna lie ahead for my family. Only time will tell I guess. My prayer is that we will have peace and that everyone will feel loved and cared for regardless of what happens.
With all that said. Today is a nice day and its Saturday. Gabby has a game. Go purple gators! She is really excited because her uncle, and aunts will be coming. Speaking of game I should probley get moving. I need to shower and get myself ready amongst getting my kids ready as well. Life is good!
Bye for now
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